I had a request from a client, the other day
via email, to talk more about Sensory
Styles or Markova Stacks in terms of groups and organizations. And,
"yes" before you ask, I'm planning to do another class very soon. I
thought was a good idea to talk about the concept of groups, organization and
even countries having a specific and secondary Sensory Style.
So what is a Sensory Style? The definition
of a Sensory Style is how a person processes what they see, hear and feel in
the world and in what order, that they process that sensory information. Each
person will have a primary or most preferred style and usually at least one
secondary style that they can easily move into if or when needed.
So what does that mean? It means we have
different verbal and non-verbal cues that tell us whether or not to let someone
into our “protective bubble”. That decision is usually automatic and
unconscious, which is fine if you live in your cave on top of your mountain
your entire life without every going anywhere.
However if you plan to move around on the
planet with all these other humans you might want to know that there are six basic methods of Sensory
Style processes.
KAV –
body smart and visually sensitive
likes touch and to be touched
being seen for who they really are is the most private part of them
KVA –
body smart and auditorally sensitive
likes touch and to be touched
being listened to and hearing their truths are the most private part of them
AKV – auditory smart
and visually sensitive
Speaks
with lots of feeling and rhythm
being seen for who they really are is the most private part of them
AVK –
auditory smart and body sensitive
Has extensive vocabulary, Speaks logically about facts,
ideas, concepts
knowing how they feel (emotionally) on the inside is the most private part of
them
VAK –
visually smart and body sensitive
Connect most
easily with others through eye contact, face reveals feelings
knowing how they feel (emotionally) on the inside is the most private part of
them
VKA – visually smart and auditory sensitive
Connect most easily with
others through eye contact, face reveals feelings
being listened to and hearing their truths are the most private part of them
Yes, I can go on for hours talking about all of the individual nuances of each
of these patterns, how wonderful each one is all of the ways that you can
conversationally elicit that information. The most important thing(s) to know
about these patterns is we do ALL of them in some context and they are variable
by situation, experience and emotional intensity. Think of these patterns which
are similar to what the
Myers/Briggs
was attempting to explain is how people do what they do and why they do that.
But what if groups, organizations and countries use these patterns as well?
They do.
Recently, I was at a Full Moon party the other day and I
noticed that this particular party was full of people who knew each other very
well and there were a few newcomers (I was one of them), not in the “click”. It
was very obvious to me that the group of people who knew one-another had
different rules of engagement for the group and for the ones not yet in the
group. It was also NOT obvious to those newcomers and I noticed a few problems
that could have escalated but luckily did not.
Small companies have their own Sensory Styles. I worked for
a sales organization in my early twenties. This company was more like a family
than a company. (except for we didn’t have any arguments at thanksgiving).
The process was simple, people worked for their own individual and team sales production.
If you were having a problem you could tell someone and the problem would get
fixed. The management was interested in the whole company succeeding and no
problem was too small to be addressed and acted on. The one thing that stood
out to me as unusual was the focus of “this is work time” and this is “off
time”. Vacations were not mandatory but we all were making so much money, why
not go somewhere and spend it?
I hear Japanese corporations are similar to this or used to
be. It probably explains why so many Japanese corporations have employee that
one for ONE COMPANY their entire life and then retire with a pension.
American and European Corporations have a different more
hands-off Sensory Style where everyone is in a cube there is no talking,
touching and frequently even different departments have no idea what’s going on
outside of their “little world”. The focus is on production, profit and in my
opinion, this “dehumanization” is far more damaging to the people, community
and the planet than anyone is taking about.
So what happens when you go to a different company, city,
state or country? Each of these groups have their own individual rules of
engagement that are so engrained in the culture that you’d never know about
them until you violate one of the unspoken rules. If you do violate the rules
it is possible that you can be removed or labeled rude, a troublemaker, etc.
Here’s a couple of examples.
In China,
it perfectly all right and socially acceptable to stare at someone without
blinking for long periods of time, the person is “just looking at you”. This
can be unnerving to Americans where our culture is organized primarily about
“no-eye contact in public.
In Spain, the men are world renown for being “very
attentive” and can make physical contact with someone they know or care about
as many as 158 times per hour.(yes there was a study, lol) If you are into
touch and being touched, go to Spain.
Conversely, England
is the best know for being formal, distant and proper. If you really don’t like
being touched all that much by strangers this could be the place for you. Each
Country, each group has individual rules of engagement but there are clues.
Here’s Five Simple
Steps for identifying Sensory Styles
1. Ask Questions
before you go.
The best way to find out something before you do anything is
ask. The internet is loaded with information on just about any topic, company,
state and country. A few minutes (or hours) of research can cut your learning
curve down significantly.
Going to Japan?
I’ll be there’s at least 10 yahoo groups that can answer any question that you
might have about Japan, it’s culture, it’s rules and how best to “BLEND”
2. Observe what other
people are doing before you jump into the deep-end of the pool.
Look before you leap. A few minutes or hours of observation may be worth the
time it takes to observe what’s really going on in a new situation. You may
even need a couple of examples. Many times group dynamics may skew your first
observation. I’ve been to a couple of places in Dallas and there is definite difference
between the people who show up early and those who arrive late. Just knowing
that one thing can be the difference between great time or boring one just by
knowing what time to arrive.
3. Find a mentor,
coach or friend.
Going to do something, you’ve never done before? Ask someone
who has been to that place, state or country, what goes on there? Can they meet
you there so you’ll have at least one person to talk to, introduce you to new
people and guide you as you walk this “new terrain”?
4. Be Flexible about
your behavior.
When I go to Mexico,
I just shift into “vacation time” because I’m not going to be able to affect
the entire country so I motor down to whatever rhythm that the general populace
is operating at and it’s all good.
I have this skill I call “vacation time”. I live in Dallas, which isn’t New York,
but it is a little more busy than Casper
Wyoming. So the time scale of Dallas has it’s own rhythm
and if you’re used to it it’s great and if you’re “new” here, it can drive your
crazy. Everyone here is 15 minutes late, so if you have a “time thing” you need
to adjust because the general populace of Dallas
isn’t going to adapt. My Mom hates coming to Dallas because it’s too busy and everyone is
in a hurry. She lives in a small town in East Texas
where the lights blink “yellow” after 6 pm. As my friend,
Robert Caruso says, “just roll with
it”.
5. Give yourself a
minimum of three examples
You may have heard try something twice before you decide whether or not you
like it. I agree. The first time you do something you have no experience
what-so-ever. So go try something to experience it. Have fun, be scared scream,
laugh or whatever it is that’s supposed to happen. Next, try it again to see,
hear, feel if you actually would consider doing it again.
My theory is do it three times. Once to experience, twice to
like it and the third time to decide whether or not you’re going to include it
into your life as a add-on, hobby or even as a career… because you never know,
right?
Want a cheat sheet or Want to know
your Personal Sensory Styles? Send me an email
The important thing to remember is just because you know how
to do something doesn’t mean that is the only way to have it done. Humans have
a remarkable about of flexibility about how, when and for what reason to do
something and the ways they devise to make that happen never cease to amaze and
astound me.
GO FORTH, BE AMAZED, and let a few people into that bubble
of yours.
I’ll talk to you again soon
Michael
About the author
Michael
Harris, PhD, internationally known hypnotist, transition coach, speaker and
author is an expert in language of communication of Sensory Stacks.
He is active locally and nationally, including private and public speaking on
the Mind/Body Connection, Hypnosis and Sensory/Learning Styles. See
his latest video on youtube
